The Anatomy of the Common Beard (Revised Edition)

After the comments and feedback left on my previous post about the bits and pieces that make up one’s beard, I now present the revised edition of The Anatomy of the Common Beard.

beard

And here’s the KEY:

PHILTRUMLINGS: The hair of the philtrum.

SIDEBURNLINGS: The hair of the sideburn.

CHEEKFUZZLINGS: The fuzzy hair of the cheek.

GINGERLINGS: The inexplicable ginger hair on blonde or brunette beard.

BERMUDATRIANGLINGS: The place where hair refuses to grow at all despite the clear geographical requirement of hair growth.

UNDERLINGS: Neck hairs.

TRANSCHESTLINGS:  The hairs that sit just under the Adam’s apple and glare enviously past the collarbone.

Thanks to Phill, Ken, #2 and Housemate Numero Uno for their input.

Comments

  1. I’ve often referred to the gingerling as the marine biologist, although this is confined to blonde with ginger beard (two tone).

    I wonder if there can’t be allowance for provisional sideburns; some (including myself) will grow their side hair long in front of the ear, in a simulation of sideburns. It’s hard to explain to barbers.

  2. This was an excellent picture.

  3. I maintain that you guys are weird.

  4. It’s a masterpiece! I will colour it in…

  5. esther

    i’ve oft wondered why there are so many sneeky fanta pants in the world, the only giveaway their beards. are they Just for Men-ing their head hair to throw girls off the trail? so that we might accidentally mate with blueys – deceit their only hope to continue the ranga race??

    no. it’s just gingerlings. phew.

  6. esther

    *sneaky

  7. Oh, the addition of the gingerling is good. These do turn into greylings though as I can attest…

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